If a child asks, “How do you tie your shoelaces?” you would simply show them how to do it.
But suppose there are no laced shoes in sight and let’s completely disregard the possibility of showing them a video tutorial on your phone.
You might choose highly descriptive words to explain the process or use hand gestures to mimic the action of tying shoelaces as a last resort. But your efforts would hardly make any sense to someone who has never tied a shoe or seen it done before.
If you’re met with a frown or a puzzled look, remember that this is what someone like me, who struggles to articulate their thoughts, experiences on a daily basis.
While the example above typically calls for a demonstration, sometimes expressing an opinion, recounting an event, or telling a story can be just as frustrating, perhaps even more so, to the point where you wish you could just show people a video of your thought process.
To paint a clearer image, imagine two people in a debate.
Person A presents their argument so clearly and precisely that you can almost feel their ideas plant themselves in your mind.
Meanwhile, Person B, though seemingly knowledgeable on the subject and staying on topic, jumps from point A to C, then back to B, making it harder for you and everyone else to follow.
You can’t help but wonder: how many years of practice would it take for Person B to reach Person A’s level of eloquence?
At first glance, the answer to why some people articulate their thoughts or argue their points with ease while others struggle might seem straightforward: it could all boil down to practice.
But the reality can be much more complex.
The difference may even lie in how we engage with our thoughts, which shapes both how clearly we understand them and how effectively we articulate them later.
Since we make sense of reality through observation, perform routine tasks on autopilot, and grasp some concepts intuitively, we often don’t feel the need to analyze or break them down unless we are deliberately studying them or need to discuss them with others.
Even when in certain situations verbal communication alone is enough to get a point across, many of us would rather show than tell if given the option, because it’s easier and more practical.
But what happens when we want to convey our deeper thoughts but just don’t know how to explain them in a way others would understand?
It’s not like we can bring people inside our minds, at least not yet, and we can’t simply expect them to just “get it.”
We can implement language tools like analogies, metaphors, or storytelling to express our more complex thoughts but those alone may not be enough.
What if there is a missing ingredient?
What do you do when you have the tools and the means but no clear sense of direction? Here you are, stuck in your own mind, trying to analyze your thoughts mid-conversation before you can even share them with others.
It’s about more than just words and vocabulary
While having a rich vocabulary is foundational to high-level language use, it alone does not guarantee clear articulation.
Articulation involves more than just knowing the right words. It’s about how our brain processes, analyzes, and organizes information. This cognitive work allows us to connect ideas and express our thoughts effectively.
Many individuals with a strong vocabulary still struggle to express themselves clearly, especially when put on the spot, whether in casual conversations, academic settings, or professional environments.
This challenge often manifests as disjointed speech, a lack of clear flow, and frequent stuttering, which can lead to misunderstandings and cause others to lose interest in the conversation altogether.
A plethora of reasons could factor into this: stress and anxiety, lack of language skills or social interaction, sleep disruptions, speech disorders, cognitive disabilities, education level, mental health status, neurological differences, or cultural background.
Some less obvious reasons for “inarticulation” include hormonal or nutritional deficiencies.
Drawing from my experience a few years back, iron deficiency anemia affected my memory recall and caused brain fog, which interfered not only with my academic performance but even with day-to-day conversations where I would stutter or freeze mid-sentence.
No amount of reading, listening, or conversing could fix that. Iron supplements and a healthier diet were my only way through.
Now, when we rule out the possibility of the aforementioned challenges and any other underlying health issues, we might become critical of our communication skills.
“I am not good at explaining things, so ask [insert name of a good communicator in your life],” is what we would sometimes say.
This common expression is the embers after the fire, spoken after we have already bullied ourselves into thinking that we can’t do anything about it.
For a long time, I have felt insecure about my verbal communication. There is an archive within my mind that keeps all the lost opportunities that a more articulate person has beaten me to.
This is the reality of our fast-paced world, where those of us who cannot express themselves in a fast, concise, and clear manner are often ignored or disregarded.
Statistics show us that the average human attention span was about 12 seconds two decades ago. However, with the rise of digital consumption, increasing distractions, and a focus on multitasking, our attention span has dropped to just 8.25 seconds.
This is reflected in everything we do, from glancing at bullet points instead of reading attentively to multitasking during conversations.
We have forgotten how to slow down in a world where instant gratification has become the norm. Our brains have adapted, now craving quick dopamine hits from rapid content consumption.
As someone who is neither concise nor a fast communicator, I’m still guilty of putting videos on 2x speed when a speaker talks slowly or takes detours, regardless of the subject they’re discussing or how brilliant they are.
This approach may seem practical if we have to squeeze in an interesting audiobook or video during work breaks, but I still wonder:
Am I missing out on truly connecting with my own thoughts? Could being more patient and listening attentively to a slow-paced speech, lecture, or conversation have given me more room to think and reflect, find insights for a life problem, or inspiration for future writing ventures?
Chances are, the answer is yes.
The human brain’s ability to absorb and deeply process information is well-documented in cognitive science.
Prominent computer scientist Leslie Valiant presents an interesting concept he calls “educability” in his book The Importance of Being Educable: A New Theory of Human Uniqueness.
We can find patterns and make connections even from random sources, let alone when we engage with content that encourages deeper thought.
Valiant contrasts this with AI, asserting that, unlike artificial intelligence, human learning is often nonlinear and unpredictable, which makes it unique and distinguishable.
Think of it like the butterfly effect. Each thought is a compass taking us to a new reality.
When I took the time to reflect and meditate on my habits and behavior I realized how often I would even procrastinate on exploring my thoughts.
By pushing away a random idea that comes to me in the spur of the moment, thinking I will explore it later, I miss out on more opportunities because, more often than not, I forget about that idea completely.
Picture it like this: you are in the middle of cleaning your desk, tossing out useless items. As you glance at the clutter, something stirs within you.
You can’t quite put it into words, but there is a sense of urgency, a faint nudge that the mess on your desk might serve a purpose.
You shrug it off and move on with your tasks as that fleeting feeling vanishes into oblivion.
But what if you let that feeling linger a little longer? What if, instead of carrying on with the next task, you sat down for one minute and looked at your cluttered desk?
You may have come up with an out-of-the-box idea to recycle that clutter and decorate your desk. Or maybe not. But who are we to know what’s on the other side of procrastinating our own thoughts?
Sometimes, a thought emerges in such a vague, unformed way that we don’t even recognize it as a thought yet. It’s these barely-there inclinations that lead to some of the most innovative creations.
Our ability to create something out of nothing is akin to expressing our most abstract thoughts. Clear articulation might just begin with how often we allow ourselves the time to ponder, organize, and reformulate those ideas.
Speak with yourself before you speak with others
If you have moved past the stigma that talking to yourself makes you odd or “crazy,” you are on the right track.
Research shows that self-talk helps with problem-solving, reasoning, and clarifying and organizing thoughts.
Having a friend who can engage in stimulating conversations is a great advantage. But that is different from self-talk, as you get to focus entirely on your own thoughts, clarifying and organizing them without outside influence.
In the past few years, talking to myself has almost become a hobby. Voicing my inner monologues and challenging my own arguments has helped me better organize my thoughts.
Over time, this practice has improved how I explain my ideas, especially in the workplace.
It so happens that this is a well-known technique called impromptu speaking which presenters and public speakers use to organize thoughts and articulate them clearly under pressure.
Impromptu speaking involves setting a timer for 2-3 minutes and speaking on a random subject without preparation.
Beyond organizing and articulating deep thoughts, if your goal is to think on your feet, this technique will prove useful.
It enables you to structure your thoughts quickly while maintaining fluency and coherence, whether in job interviews, answering unexpected questions during presentations, or in social gatherings where you want to express your ideas spontaneously.
Another effective method is exploratory writing, where you free-write your ideas, questions, or problems without worrying about conclusions or clarity at first.
Your draft will gradually stutter into a clear, logical flow that you can later process and read out loud to sharpen your verbal communication.
Ultimately, people don’t become skilled at expressing themselves and their ideas overnight.
The great speakers we admire, conversationalists, lecturers, teachers, or debaters, first take time to think about their thoughts and let them flow freely before finding the right words to share them with us.
Self-reflection, paired with deliberate practice, serves as the foundation for structuring our thoughts and articulating them with clarity
Digital overload is the death of deep thinking
By not delving into our thoughts or ideas, we hinder our ability to understand and communicate them effectively. But what if we lack the motivation to begin with?
When we have already made connections in our minds, it can be tempting to fall into complacency, avoiding further mental effort, which can then lead to a superficial understanding of concepts rather than a profound, insightful one. But again, what if we simply can’t be bothered?
This is known as “cognitive apathy,” a lack of motivation or interest in engaging in complex cognitive tasks or challenging mental activities, like problem-solving or deep thinking.
In our digital age, one of the many contributors to cognitive apathy is mental fatigue caused by passive consumption of information.
Rapid, short-form content is everywhere, making challenging mental activities feel like a hassle or a waste of time.
Artificial intelligence is also starting to do much of the thinking for us. Our world is now an intersection between the old and the new.
For instance, we use digital screens and VR headsets with our non-adjusted, damage-susceptible human eyes, and our children’s still-developing brains, exposed to phones and tablets, are already dealing with addiction.
Technological advances are beneficial for our future, but we sometimes forget that we are still operating with our biologically limited human bodies and fail to balance the benefits against the potential harm.
Technology, as with everything else, is a double-edged sword. The internet has given us unprecedented access to information, knowledge, and inspiration, connecting countless artists, thinkers, and innovators to the world in ways previously unimaginable. Yet, it has also fragmented us.
As Sherry Turkle writes in her book, Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other, “The network is seductive. But if we are always on, we may deny ourselves the rewards of solitude.”
The real progress for humanity is not about having powerful tools at our disposal, it’s about how we choose to use them.
Throughout history we have always interacted with our inventions, shaping and being shaped by them, often letting them control us. In this case, it’s our minds that we are losing control of.
How many brilliant minds go untapped because they are too distracted by their social apps or too overwhelmed by information when just a few hours of solitude and deep reflection could have transformed their worlds and ours?
How many of us struggle with attention spans so short that we can’t fully listen to what a friend, a stranger, or a child has to say?
Could a 21st-century Albert Einstein, Marie Curie, or Carl Jung be too busy scrolling right now to answer the call of their muses?
